January 2019 - Personal And Progressive

Autistic Lincs has returned for 2019 and what an intriguing year it is set to be.

My name is Callum Brazzo and to reintroduce myself, I am a 27 year old proudly autistic man living in Spalding, and many months ago I took it upon myself to create this weekly column. Its purpose is to build a bridge between the autistic community and our area.

You may be thinking this isn’t necessary but in the world I live in, from small-scale discrimination and bad practice, to full-on abusive injustice, it is absolutely crucial that I remain as an autistic-led source of information and communication.

If you have been reading Autistic Lincs for some time then you will have an idea of the topics I have covered in the past such as sex and sexuality, homelessness, stimming, politics, masking and Paddy McGuinness!

But I want you all to know that in 2019, I am starting with a clean slate and so it is so important to me that you keep sending in letters, contacting me through social media and any other way you can engage with me because I don’t just write this for myself.

I have endured a struggle of feeling invalid as a then-undiagnosed autistic man with OCD and Tourettes. I have been crippled with anxieties and had to get a taxi to what was my alternative to school. I have been in and out of the SEN department and isolation. I have been a truant hiding in toilets or outside of school.

The reason I tell you these things, and I am very open, is that knowing where I have been helps me know where I can go.

In terms of Autistic Lincs and in life.

Additionally, I am a performance poet who utilises the arts as his main platform of expression for himself and others and I have good things ahead in 2019.

January 2019 - We Are Enough

For too long, autistic people have been the passive, pity parties of our communities, where you say 'Ah, bless' at their achievements or a claim us, perhaps even me, to be 'inspirational'.

Whilst I'll be the first person to celebrate milestones of my own personal journey, I would rather not be looked at as a 'hero' because of what I have overcome, if what I have supposedly 'overcome' is being autistic.

Autistic people overcome stigmas built into our society around what people think we can and can't do, defined by books as a disorder and symbolised by puzzle pieces as if something is 'missing'.

Many people, admittedly, want to support autistic people without really knowing the history of the puzzle piece and 'Lighting it up blue', both of which are extremely offensive and counter-productive, and if there is room for open conversations, then I have time for those people.

 

But some people actively oppress the voices of people like me because I am not like their child.

I am too 'high-functioning' and do not reflect a non-verbal, head-hitting autistic person.

What do you do for those people?

What do we do for AUTISTIC people?

Love them, engage with them on THEIR terms.

Give them space. Presume competence.

 

We have enough going on with the sensory and social friction of how we process the world against how others process the world and we need to develop compassionate classrooms where the autistic person is not seen as 'distracting the learners' or 'less capable' based on outsiders' perspectives.

We have to listen to autistic voices.

Metaphorically AND literally.

There is no 'autism epidemic', as various high-power personalities will have you believe and it is time for a massive cultural shift.

It is time for the autistic revolution.

It is to reclaim ourselves, reclaim the narrative surrounding autistic people and rise against the injustice thrown onto us by so-called 'autism warriors' and by those that want to 'train' us out of being our true autistic selves.

In later weeks, we will explore the scope of these problems but, for now, I say this...

Enough is enough. WE are enough.

The way I express my true autistic self and amplify the voices of others is through my poetry, therefore I have a few events to signpost you to, as well as some further reading in general because the autistic revolution begins when we become aware of what we are fighting for. Human rights are autistic rights.

January 2019 - Facebook Foundations

This time around, I have a major announcement to make that I am really excited about.

So, in addition to the newspaper pieces every Tuesday, I am expanding our online reach to a new Facebook page!

 

With opportunities for live video chats and interviews, up-to-date discussions on the current Autistic Lincs of that week, local and national news and more, it means that you won't have to wait a week for your dose of Autistic Lincs content (and neither will I!)

Of course, feel free to comment on what you'd like to read or learn more about as well so we can grow together.

Let's share good practice, articles we find interesting and get to know our community better!

It is super important to note that this page is FOR EVERYONE because I am a big believer in uniting, uplifting and teaching people and rather than preach to a choir (perhaps those in the SEN community who are familiar with autistic individuals) I want to connect with a new layer of readership.

Go now and check out the page, introduce yourself if you like and read back our last 2 columns 'Personal, Progressive' and 'We Are Enough' and join the discussions!

January 2019 - A Question Of Origin

My Facebook page announcement seems to be going down well, so I must take some time to thank all the people that are enjoying our new venture.

But now, onto our topics this week.

Before we cover three stories that have grabbed my attention, I want you to think about this everlasting question.

Which came first, the chicken or the egg?

The issue here, as I comprehend it, is one of origin.

A chicken hatches from an egg - but a chicken has to create the egg - so what came first​​?

This is integral to my first story in a literal way because 'chicken therapy' is a thing and a particular place in Leicestershire made news because of the therapy helping autistic children.

It was noted that the therapy helps them gain trust of people and more specifically, in my mind at least, the unpredictable nature of the human maze we call social interaction.

It's well-documented how animals interacting with autistic individuals has many benefits that are exclusive to that partnership.

For example, a chicken is unlikely to care about eye contact, unlike their human counterparts, and as you may know, eye contact is physically painful for autistic people and often unnecessary in the grand scheme of COMMUNICATION.

But using chickens as opposed to horses, dogs, cats or any other member of the animal world, has its dark history.

Chickens have links to 'chicken camp' and ABA therapy.

 

ABA, despite people thinking there is 'good' ABA and 'bad' ABA, is rooted in the principle of making autistic people 'indistinguishable from their peers' and this is harmful to autistic people because it fails to account for the autistic identity as a natural brain wiring and instead renders autistic traits something to be coaxed out of.

So there are, indeed, two sides of the fence here, each with their own paths to go down.

Chicken therapy and 'trust' or ABA and 'compliance'? When picking out therapies that help autistic people, it's important to think about what is being achieved by it and whose needs it serves, because they can have very different outcomes. The chicken therapy at Rainbow Horses in Leicestershire seems to be a positive example of the connection between animals and autistic folk.

Next then, a flashback to another story on a mother whose child was diagnosed as autistic 'incorrectly' and the end result was in fact a diagnosis of PANDAS. According to the charity PANS PANDAS UK, PANS (Paediatric Acute-onset Neuropsychiatric Syndrome), it is a neuropsychiatric condition triggered by a misdirected immune response which results in an inflammation of a child's brain.

Autism, as we mentioned in my very first Autistic Lincs (Autism, A Human Story), IS in the brain but it IS NOT an inflammation.

A lot of autistic people take great offence to their brain wiring being referred to as an inflammation, an autoimmune disease and anything other than brain wiring.

I do not deny the struggle of individuals with PANDAS, of course, as the boy in this story did not want to live anymore.

That is majorly upsetting, primarily for the the son, mother and all others directly involved.

Additionally, it's been reported in an article that in 2018, the World Health Organisation recognised the condition. However, in the UK, it is lesser known and children are sent to Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services (CAMHS), when they don't need the assistance.

Sounds a lot like autistic people with how their mental health may or not present.

Again, it's a case of where you sit on the fence because making the diagnosis mean something for the individual is crucial but we must also look at who the therapeutic and medication routes are benefitting.

Lastly, we have a protest that occurred on Saturday against Tui Na massage.

AIM (Autistic Inclusive Meets) is an autistic-led charity fighting against the gross injustices committed against autistic people, some aggressive and apparent ( EG, bleach enemas) and some subtle yet extremely counter-productive (EG, ABA).

Tui Na fits into the second category or being subtle but extremely counter-productive, especially when you have seen what I have seen. There is a particular video that circulates online of a child being forced down by a 'practitioner' without permission and when Tui Na massage is an unproven and unregulated for autistic treatment, you must consider this.

Is it about trust or compliance?

The massage surely has various calming benefits but even the most well-intentioned practices and thought processes, when you dig deeper, can be exposed as very negative.

The video I refer to is an abuse of trust with a view to compliance, both of which harm the autistic identity because whilst there are sensory and social differences with autistic people, it is not something that needs 'detoxing' or 'curing.'

More on these stories on our Facebook page but let me leave you where we began.

Which came first, the chicken or the egg?

Well, if we're to look at autistic identity as the chicken and the INTERPRETATIONS of that autistic identity as the egg...both are important - but without the chicken or the egg growing in positive, accepting conditions of its nature, you won't get the best out of either.


February 2019 - Jokes Aside

Fresh off the comedy club last weekend at the South Holland Centre, I witnessed the joys of laughing together as one community. One of my autistic community's own, Britain's Got Talent finalist Robert White, was the headliner and he delivered.

Though he did cleverly intermingle aspects of both his autistic and gay identity into his act, anybody in any art form can and will draw material from themselves. It wasn't done egotistically, it's merely easy to pull from what you know and Robert's set in particular drew my attention. I was talking with someone last week about why I am so doggedly focussed on autistic issues and my reasoning is rooted in the fact that, for far too long, autistic people (and indeed the gay community) have been and still are a marginalised group, so it made me personally ecstatic to see Robert succeed on BGT but also to attract and keep an audience entertained. And we're not talking 'inspiration porn' (“Aww, isn't it amazing that the autistic man is a comedian.”)

No need to bring pity parties because if his comedy was no good, it wouldn't matter if he was autistic or not...but the Funhouse Comedy Club last Friday wasn't about that for so many people.

We had a good time!

Drinks, comedy, community.

These components of life affect us all and we took the opportunity to embrace that.

I wrote about Robert White in the 2018 Autistic Lincs column Talent Speaks For Itself and I pondered how Robert might use his platform and I am happy to report that he and I will be part of the second ever Autism Arts Festival in Canterbury, Kent, in April. Remember that April is Autism Acceptance Month....but more on that nearer the time.

What does all this have to do with Jeremy Corbyn?

Well, in a broad sense, it's about representation.

Robert White is a source of excellent and authentic information and on February 9, I will travel to London to engage in the inaugural Neurodivergent Labour Launch. As mentioned on the Facebook page, within the Labour Party it says the 'new organisation aims to represent autistic, dyslexic, dyspraxic and dyscalculic people, and people with ADD (with or without hyperactivity), Tourette's or other developmental atypical neurological conditions.'

Representation in the arts, politics and in life is so crucial to get right if we are ever going to create tangible change for the marginalised groups of society such as the autistic community.

 

Given my past dislike for how certain politicians and people of power utilise their pedestals to stand above the solidarity and acceptance we desire, this matters.

Jeremy Corbyn's Brain Party is an invitation to consume as much knowledge of the past as possible to influence a better future for generations to come.

At this part, there may be drinks to indulge in.

There will absolutely be a community.

But when it comes to accurate representation of autistic people; it is no joke.


February 2019 - The Price Of Patients 

First off, there WILL be exclusive content coming soon on the Autistic Lincs Facebook page, I promise!

Alright, well it's been another manic week with news to report and especially news to hone in on.

Katie Price saying that she needs to put her autistic son Harvey in residential care (confirmed last Friday as official) because he is 'danger to himself' and 'scares other children.'

Marshall Bourne suffering a fractured neck after being assaulted in Tunbridge Wells and, at the time of writing, without a formal statement because the police force don't have a specially trained officer to ensure the integrity of any evidenced supplied by Marshall.

In these two stories alone, you have the stark contrast of 'protection' and peril.

I highlight the word protection because of the supposition involved in what the danger is here.

There are autistic people with high support needs, of course, and also autistic people with co-occurring conditions like Harvey who is also blind with Prader-Wili syndrome. However, as I referenced in last week's article with therapies...it's important to discuss whose needs are being served by the therapy (or residential care in this case) being delivered.

Let's stop treating autistic people as 'babies' or 'less than.' Simply human will do.

In no way am I suggesting tha Katie Price is 'evil' but there are questions raised in my mind because people send autistic people to ATUs or assessment and treatment units and a lot of the rationale behind those decisions can be unpacked in a different way.

And from the high-profile celebrity case with Katie Price and Harvey, we come to Marshall Bourne.

 

He and his family feel let down by Kent Police, but the same principle applies here as with Harvey's perceived issues.

Base all decisions on a foundation of humanity, presume competence, absorb input from actually autistic people (follow the #ActuallyAutistic hashtag on Twitter/X for just a few insights) and finally, to reiterate, observe whose needs are being served in the situation.

 

Concluding our paper issue this week, I want to update people on a project I initially introduced February a year ago called Compass. 

The update is that I plan to have what I am calling a 'progression of realities.' This is to mean that I will have a trio of 'related but stand-alone' productions in the following order; book – short film – theatre show.

So far, the first draft of the book is finished with the working title Janice.

I will be posting the unofficial blurb for the book on the Autistic Lincs Facebook page.

The short film will likely be about the beginning of the book and the theatre show...will be Compass as planned.

Sprinkled in all of the productions will be an autistic character and a lady with dementia and I bring all of this up because as you may already know, I am a massive believer in the arts and its capacity to contribute to our communities.

So what better way to promote autistic-led content for the masses that can serve to fight against stigmas, the horrors of ATUS and hate crime than through these platforms for change.

 

February 2019 - The Puppetry Of Perspective 

This week, we will chat about the play All In A Row, BBC's Children In Need and an autistic-led London charity's expansion.

To begin with, we must chat about All In A Row.

By the time you read this on Tuesday, there will be many more reviews in, I am sure, but here is an extract from the summary it gives:

'Like any couple, Tamora and Martin have big hopes and dreams. But when your child is autistic, non-verbal, and occasionally violent, ambitions can quickly become a pipe dream.'

I picked this sentence out because it gives a massively negative impression. I have spoken to people and have gauged the reaction online, that would have to see it before they made any informed judgement.

 

But what irks me is that there is no need to negatively (and inaccurately) frame an autistic person as the hopes and dreams crusher so irrespective of the overall message that may be delivered in the play, its intonations are horrible.

Can non-verbal autistic people not have full lives?

Of course they can.

Is it accurate or respectful to paint an autistic person's sensory needs or potential distress as 'occasionally violent'?

No.

Through whose perspective are we seeing this story?

Certainly not an autistic one.

And then there's the puppet.

So many people have mentioned the autistic identity as a puppet and why it's wrong, I won't tread over this ground but I mean, really?

1 word for it is dehumanising.

Staying with the dehumanisation of autistic people, the other big news I've picked up for today's column is that BBC's Children In Need have donated a grant of £109,000 to a charity implementing ABA (Applied Behavioural Analysis) in their Early Years' Service.

As I have said before, some people blindly believe they are doing good things for autistic people when they see fundraising and the worst acts come from the best intentions, but for the BBC to do this without seeing the massive amount of autistic people that hate or have been acquired PTSD via ABA, seems lazy for such a power-wielding corporation.

It makes me laugh and at the same time angry when I read the charity's description of its Early Years Service: 'The programme focuses on behaviours, relationships and developmental play, underpinned by ABA.

'We tailor teaching techniques around the needs and preferences of each child.

'The principal foundation of ABA is to ensure you do the exact opposite of tailoring needs and preferences to the child.'

There was a fantastic meme, I believe, that I saw once and it read something along the lines of 'Why should non-autistic accommodate autistic people? Because we accommodate you ALL THE TIME' and it's true.

On a human level, you want a child to behave safely and understand the world it lives in and understand itself...but it is crucial to understand whose needs we are serving when we make plays or apply ABA.

Last week, I wrote that instead of autistic people being treated as babies or less than, 'Simply human will do' and I stand by that but we absolutely do not count out the autistic identity because it DOES define us.

A definition isn't a death sentence, we just have to get the depiction right.

And right now, we don't.

Ignorance and hate are pulling the strings and it is us as people, that are the puppets.

But we must AIM for the rainbow.

And that's what the London charity A.I.M., which I have plugged before, is doing with the new branch of their charity tree for LGBTQIA+ neurodivergent people of all ages.

It's in its infancy as a specific branch of their tree but the roots are firmly in autistic ground and unlike Pinocchio's nose, when you put these topics All In A Row, this charity will not grow based on lies, but on whole autistic truths.

February 2019 -  Vax And Fiction 

This subject is seemingly multi-layered and very personal to a lot of people.

That's what you'd be led to believe but I am telling you my say on the matter as an authentic source, purely because this subject is about me. I'm talking vaccines and autism.

I bring this up because of the news that only dropped towards the end of the week which is YouTube pulling ads from anti-vax, meaning anti-vaccination, conspiracy videos.

Why is that news?

Why wouldn't you vaccinate?

What is the conspiracy?

The answers link to a column posted online on in August 2018 (How To End The Hate Epidemic) when I wrote about a book coming out at the time which detailed how to 'end' autism.

You will forgive me when I get offended at the thought of something wanting to eradicate my existence. My neurology is nothing to be ashamed of, however many desperate people go to desperate measures as wild as camel's milk to bleach enemas.

But when it comes to vaccines, although the desperation can often still be part of The Why, thousands of people are actively choosing not to get life-saving shots in fear of the autistic identity.

I do not to give the man, the 'doctor' responsible for the mainstream delusion that the MMR (Measles, Mumps and Rubella) vaccine caused you to be autistic any more fame by posting his name, honestly, but I will share his name at least once for the purpose of history.

Andrew Wakefield. This man was eventually struck off the list as an official doctor which has its fair share of publicity and I won't go into the background here but rather focus on the very real implications of his actions and the human connection that was missed in all of it.

I am autistic. Many of us relate to people and relate to the world differently and the social and sensory processing of the universe we all inherit can be gently nurtured not to rewire but to spark unique and beautiful connections of our own. This can be done without forcing us to connect in a certain way, certain ways that damage our autistic selves.

 

Vaccines save lives. Autistic lives don't need saving.

We are not your victims. We may have vulnerable moments of distress, confusion due to the social and sensory processing we do every day to accommodate OTHERS, but understanding the triggers of our communication with you is at the root of it all.

So I'm sure YouTube taking the actions they have will further promote this idea that the anti-vax community harvest which is of 'Big Pharma.'

This is about pharmaceutical companies conspiring against us with the government to make our children and people 'ill'. Autism is not a sickness, ignorance and hate is, so once again I implore you to check the root of the situation, engage with authentic sources of information (hint, hint) and really find out what the autistic community want and what we don't want.

We've spent generations accommodating you so it's time to reverse the roles ever so slightly, wouldn't you say?

The remaining issue I will very lightly touch upon is 'regression.'

People think they are seeing autistic people 'regress' into former stages of development due to the vaccine and in reality, this is a matter of 'correlation does not equal causation'.

Just because two things seem linked, they aren't.

Please, please, please, let's stop living like autistic people are diseased, othered and generally undesirable freaks and start living humanely?

I'll be glad to further reveal the facts and the fiction of our autistic identities but one thing you cannot do is judge a book by its cover.

Autistic people have written and, indeed, are writing paragraphs of our personalities, chapters of our communities and creating autistic-led narratives to delve into.

Let's have quiet in the library and read some of them.


March 2019 - 1 Year Autiversary

A very special week for Autistic Lincs as it's our one year anniversary.

It's been a whole year of forming Autistic Lincs and the foundation laid down in Autism: A Human Story, has not changed because autistic people are rooted in humanity as we all are and autistic rights are human rights.

The political landscape has shifted with the election of Donald Trump, bringing vaccination fears, shared by the company he has kept, back to the forefront, and has made for very fertile ground for true autistic advocates to stand up and use their platforms to repel the myths of the MMR-autism link because we are not diseases to cure, or broken toys to throw out the pram, but humans.

Callum Brazzo (7534689)

Anti-vaccination rhetoric is extremely harmful to push forward but there is another deeply harmful agenda lurking in the form of ABA (Applied Behavioural Analysis). This ABA therapy, widely used in the educational landscape, is damaging the autistic person's sense of their own identity.

But, as I will link below, there are other ways to achieve the outcomes that educators wish to achieve without the compromise that ABA inflicts.

With the anti-vaccination AKA anti-vax movement and ABA alike, it is once again imperative to assess whose needs are being served as we progress through 2019 in the ever-evolving sphere of life.

So whilst there will be unfortunately familiar ground to cover, as we march on... through 2019, there is always going to be room for fresh topics to cover and always in the shoes, the footsteps, of the autistic community.

The Autistic Lincs Facebook page was created to reflect the fast-paced kaleidoscope of news and I am happy to make a few announcements regarding the Facebook page.

On Friday at 1pm, we will have a LIVE CHAT from Gosberton House Academy!

Because for all the national stories I speak on, it's a necessity to include your own local stories if you want to get the full picture.

So why WOULDN'T I put the highly respected establishment in the spotlight?

On a personal note, Gosberton House was an X spot on my map to unearthing my full potential.

But there were others too...

John Fielding School. Boston College.

Watch this space.

As we continue to make Autistic Lincs, feedback is key so get in contact with me or the editor about your favourite column so far and any new subjects you want to chat about because the idea is to unite rather than divide. Enough of that happens in the world.

Speaking of uniting, as I am literally writing this column (evidence of the fast-paced kaleidoscopic nature of news) Connor Sparrowhawk is a name being discussed online as one to headline an Eddie Stobart truck as he adored them.

Connor Sparrowhawk, known to many as Laughing Boy, was an 18-year-old boy subject to gross malpractice, in a very blunt summary, and it is not that I want to avoid his story, it is in the news for all to see, but I just want his story to influence change.

Immortalising his legacy in an Eddie Stobart Truck would not only be a physical, communal reminder and public display of unity, but it would metaphorically be a way to signal that the stories do not end but instead they move us all forward.

And as Autistic Lincs moves forward, I will continue to tell authentic, collaborative, human stories.

February 2019 - Bringing Acceptance To Action

I am feeling overjoyed that our one-year anniversary week was so well received and this is massive encouragement to keep bringing more live content.

If you are not online or you don't know what happened, last week I was at the esteemed Gosberton House Academy, listed as autism specialist, and I sat down to talk to the principle Louise Stanton and listen to the children's perspective of their school.

I was impressed.

Sitting down with Louise Stanton was big for me on a personal level too because I'd worked with her on a course in 2011 but, as I was finding myself in that period, had never conversed as the adults we are now and it was a special moment.

That was on Friday but we had a lot going on all day, as per usual, so let's keep it moving.

The world is currently rife with vaccination and anti-vaccination rhetoric battles and the past several days have been subject to lots of articles, perhaps most notably Facebook, who have said that they will crackdown on anti-vaccine content and, according to Wired Magazine's report, "it will no longer allow it to be promoted through ads or recommendations", and will make it less prominent in search results. The social network will not take down anti-vaccine posts entirely, however. The company also said it was exploring ways to give users more context about vaccines from “expert organisations.”

As far as I can comprehend, I have no qualms with organisations that have scientifically proven and morally grounded roots in its arguments.

I don't want autistic people to die or to suffer based on lies and against the fact that diseases kill people.

And autism is not a disease.

But even when people have the best intentions and DON'T see autism as a disease, abuse can occur as is evidenced by the Mendip Injustice.

Two years ago, I protested the cover-up from the National Autistic Society (NAS), at their Somerset care home Mendip House. The Mendip House Injustice is abhorrent and I won't post details here as I have referenced some of them in the past but it was five years, before the protest, that this had been going on for. But it doesn't end there.

Because now, I am protesting again.

Autistic Inclusive Meets (AIM), an autistic-led charity in London, says this about the protest they have organised:

"The National Autistic Society held their own private investigation in 2014, they hid the horrific excuse carried out on Mendip residents until 2016 when a whistle blower exposed then to the council.

"The residents were highly vulnerable autistic adults. They had money taken from them, were sworn at and harassed.

They were thrown into swimming pools and fed hot chillies.

This was done by NAS staff.

The NAS has just been fined £4,000 with no prosecution. This is an insult to the residents and their families."

I know that may be hard to read for many of you, especially if you came to read my thoughts on the Gosberton House Academy live, but amongst all the clutter of our lives, these are the kinds of very real issues I am aware of and am fighting. However, I do not fight with fists.

It would be simple yet wasteful to fight in a physical sense so I choose words. I use my platforms to lift others up instead of burying them down.

I fight with knowledge and I fight with humanity.

Gosberton House Academy, accounted for by my visit on Friday, is a place of security and a place of power and we must protect and nurture it at all costs because the cost of an autistic life is far too much to compromise for the sake of a badly understood 'treatment'.

Despite the efforts we can make with our words, our art and our legal documentation alike, talk is cheap...

As we approach Autism Acceptance Month, I ask all my readers to bring acceptance to action.

March 2019 - The Compassionate Classroom

So many concentric circles of subjects, overlapping in their timeframe and almost overwhelming in their prominence but I will address what I can.

The Education Awards has opened up for nominations once again this year and in voting for those individuals, schools and colleges that do so much good, it is indeed recognising the sheer mass and quality of our local people.

Whether it's attaining or maintaining grade standards, developing new pathways to learning, particular acts that stand above the rest or a multitude of other reasons to be recognised, the awards are so immensely positive for us all.

If only to highlight a reason for the education awards' existence, there is a lot of bad stuff happening in the world that we cannot ignore.

ATUS (Assessment and Treatment Units) are secure units for autistic people and people with learning disabilities. However, the 'assessment' in many cases has been shown to be sorely lacking and the 'treatment' dire.

Rifts between social workers and parents, autistic people and anti-vaccination theorists and finally autistic people and parents, are wide and unsettling to most. But as it says on the London Underground, we have to 'Mind The Gap' between all of these groups of people, objectively analysing each of their standpoints and allowing the truth step forward in fresh, gold light.

And it all revolves around education.

 

There are generations of people that have grown up with exposure to certain stereotypes of autistic people or 'studies' on autistic people and that's all they have known. When people reach an age where their future is fading quicker than the immediate present - aka ageing - and perhaps steadfast in their old ways, I'm not sure how much good it is trying to change someone's mind.

Rather then, we have to look at building NEW memories of autistic people, role models, resources and assemble a framework for viewing autistic people and neurotypical people under the same tint of humanity.

I propose The Compassionate Classroom.

Instead of placing blame on the autistic person for distracting learners, for example, can you we not rally round the individual (probably not literally) as a class when we are at nursery, school, or wherever else because we as people make the autistic person the 'other.' Autistic people are not inherently bad people yet so much of our messaging and our framework for seeing autistic people is so negative and puts it all on us to adapt to majority norms.

This way of thinking has to stop because if it doesn't, suicide and filicide rates continue to rise, ATUs continue to have their place in society,

 

The Compassionate Classroom is a mindset we execute in practice simply by behaving in humane and collaborative ways or at the very least, encouraging it.

When an autistic person has a meltdown or shutdown, these are not conscious choices of the autistic person to cause a disturbance but actually a time of need and in this situation, under The Compassionate Classroom model, the whole class would be aware of what the autistic people needs or MIGHT need and react accordingly.

Of course, this ideal 'base level' understanding takes time but I, alongside my autistic adult support group Autistic Led, am putting on an event next month centred around the film Napoleon Dynamite.

More information is coming on the event but for lots of people, I am sure, it will be the beginning of the conversations we need to have to ensure that acceptance is brought to action, education to execution.

April 2 is World Autism Awareness Day.

April 1-7 is World Autism Awareness Week.

April itself is Autism Acceptance Month

Your choices and actions can last a lifetime.

Please, make a real difference.

March 2019 - The Future Is Gold

If you are on the Autistic Lincs Facebook page, you'll know that I was going to expand on my plans for World Autism Awareness Week/Day/Month WHATEVER.

Frankly, a lot of autistic people hate this month because everyone jumps on the bandwagon of 'good will,' 'awareness' and other factors that are rendered superficial in comparison to work that still needs to be done and practices that are ignored.

But there are gems in our county and across the way as far as Portsmouth and Manchester and it is essential to give them their golden spotlight.

I am writing this column at my desk after spending the day (Sunday….) on the 'Walk For Autism' hosted by David Snape, of David Snape Show acclaim.

David is a Bourne autistic man who is really making himself known and carving an autistic-led path for the county with his radio show and it is always a pleasure to have his company.

David's desires to get positive messages about autistic people out in the open are so wonderful and, as an autistic man myself, I really hope that the walk and other ventures continue to evolve and flourish.

Furthermore, there is a coffee morning at Sleaford Town Council on April 2 (World Autism Awareness Day) which is described online as 'A coffee morning to support Autism awareness and acceptance, with Rainbow stars children and adults speaking throughout the day to give you an insight into life on the Autistic spectrum.'

YES, PLEASE.

This kind of thing is sorely needed and not only are autistic adults leading themselves but there are allies out there that see the very real benefits of autistic adults having a platform at all!

I will update you on this event after it's happened, obviously, but I will be speaking/performing under the title 'Autistic Lincs, Autistic Led' which are the platforms I utilise to create authentic, productive and collaborative conversations about autistic people but the title also carries undertones of the principles my community lives by and I am so excited!

Lighting It Up Gold is so much better than lighting up blue because the colour blue represents a charity that wants to cure us and think of us as diseased.

This, as I've said many times over I know, is NOT the case but especially around this month, people think they are doing things in the best interests of autistic people but that is NOT the case either.

 

The ways we can help autistic people are best understood by engaging with autistic people. David Snape, in addition to the Sleaford uprising of gilded glory, are two solid examples of how we can truly engage and make a real difference.

Coming out of Lincolnshire, temporarily, Portsmouth's Spinnaker Tower is a magnificent sight to behold but last year it got even better and the prospects of autistic lives thriving got brighter when it decided to Light It Up Gold in respect of, and in solidarity with the autistic community, so many of whom approve the symbolic colour.

It is then with immense joy that I announce that in the evening of April 2, I will be in Portsmouth to witness, as I did last year, the illumination of Spinnaker Tower alongside many of my autistic allies.

Additionally, whilst the Spinnaker Tower illumination is recurring, Manchester will hold its first ever Autistic Pride event in June!

(June is a month when a lot of autistic pride events/picnics happen so this is very important to note but we will explore that in due course!)

Before April 2 though, we have the first ever open mic night at Sergi's Tapas Bar 7:30pm-10pm on Thursday, March 28, where I will be performing and utilising my platform, and March 29 and on this day, I will peacefully protest once more outside the National Autistic Society Headquarters to honour the victims of the Mendip House Injustice.

In conjunction with the advocacy work that David does and the platform Rainbow Stars utilises exceptionally well, we have to be aware of the aforementioned incompetence, inexcusable and the injustice that is rampant in the roots of my community too.

I don't mean to end on a sour note but there is a balance to strike not only this day, week or month but all-year round and we have to tip that balance in ways that genuinely promote acceptance of autistic people and allow them to just 'be.'

There are carats of gold everywhere and it's up to us, autistic and neurotypical alike, to mine them and never to sell them short of what they are worth.

And autistic people are worth every damn bit because the future….is gold.

April 2019 - You're Worth It

April is upon us and by the time you read this in the paper on Tuesday, I will be at Sleaford Town Council Lighting It Up Gold for a talk called “Autistic Lincs, Autistic Led” about my journey and the platforms I utilise for myself and for the autistic community.

In the evening, I will be Lighting Up the Spinnaker Tower in Portsmouth.

But across the pond in France, a newly-established autistically-centred community called Crimson û counter-protested against a charity endorsing ABA. There was physical conflict at the expense of this Magnificent Seven. The ABA-endorsing charity’s president, as I understand, enforced or certainly did not seem to object to, the assault on the seven autistic people.

It is yet another stark reminder of why more autistic people should advocate for themselves and find as many outlets for their messages as possible to build bridges of communication to us all, autistic or not.

I have talked before about how poetry transformed my life by channelling my emotions and negative experiences but last week I reached a pinnacle of personal achievement.

It was the inaugural open mic night in Spalding at Sergi’s Tapas Bar and my father came to watch me perform a very revealing set about my secondary school education, my autistic identity, my relationship and the contrast between grief and hope.

I did not walk into the tapas bar alone, however, as members of Autistic Led followed in with me to come for a night out.

It would not have mattered to me how many, or whom, exactly came to the night with me.

I know from experience that not everybody is going to cope with, or desire, what an open mic night offers in general let alone the intimate venue of Sergi’s.

I would never force anybody to walk alongside me in the woodlands of life as a member of my neural tribe, my neurosiblings of all shapes and sizes, but on that night and potential nights to come, I felt incredibly proud to be autistic and proud of what I am doing with my life.

I was guided through life and here I am guiding others. Rooted in the autistic community but branching out in ways that suit the individuals.

This is not bragging. This is testament to my own journey becoming a collective journey and as we think about autism acceptance this month and as we celebrate World Autism Awareness Day today, let us never forget the impact that is being made by autistic people from Europe to America and beyond. To the autistic people reading this, YOU ARE WORTH IT.

For every injustice, from Mendip House to the courts of Ireland and the streets of France with Crimson û, there are people out there making a real difference.

This April, I urge to be one of them.

April 2019 - Dynamite

 

This week, we continue our theme of Autism Acceptance Month with some more autistically-centred events happening around and outside of the county as well as some new projects.

First and foremost, I wanted to bring your attention to 15 Years of Napoleon Dynamite, an afternoon brought to you by South Holland Arts Centre and Autistic Led.

It’s the inaugural collaboration of the centre and my autistic adult support group and is event centred around the film Napoleon Dynamite, which doesn’t outright state it’s about an autistic person…but it could be… and that’s interesting and a definite discussion point.

We will explore this and there will be a special performance from me alongside a few other activities to embrace the day and make a real difference to autistic people’s lives.

Currently typing this in Liverpool Street station, London, I am reflecting on the autistic community and how it converged on 14th April to Charlton House and Garden in Woolwich. The event? Autistic Pride.

I, alongside so many others, performed for the purpose of sharing our narratives in our own ways.

There was poetry, music, speeches and even a manifesto reading from an emerging political party’s organisation led by autistic people (Neurodivergent Labour!)

I was very emotionally charged by the poetry and whilst it’s impossible to pick a favourite, a stand-out was certainly Janine Booth’s newly-crafted poem about 40 autistic people who have died or been mistreated nonetheless called Narrative Verdict.

Agony Autie spoke about embracing the stim.

Stimming, as I think I have mentioned before, is self-stimulatory behaviour which regulates and soothes thoughts and emotion and, well, sometimes it just feels GOOD. It was a powerful speech because it gave yet another autistic perspective on autistic voices that are pushed out, drowned out and stifled by those that speak above us or speak FOR us.

 

I have been to Autistic Pride events before in Hyde Park but this was the first organised by Autistic Inclusive Meets also known as A.I.M. which is a London-based charity I have linked before and think very highly of.

Emma Dalmayne, the CEO, even mustered the confidence to sing and conclude the event with The ABA Song,which is a vital piece of our narrative.

I could say SO much more about the event but I will link the event page below.

So by the time you’ve read this, I will have been back staying with my grandmother and this is symbolic.

It is symbolic because what happens outside of Spalding, outside of Lincolnshire, matters. We’re part of a bigger picture and this knowledge gives me strength and validity to this column, the support group… and to me.

We, as autistic people, are enough and our narrative is valid… but my grandmother will pass away. And this is symbolic of our responsibilities as youth to create the future we will inherit and generations to come will inherit. It’s a generation game.

I do not mean just autistic people but EVERYONE.

Henceforth, I return to Spalding feeling revitalised, refocussed and ready, whether it’s to permeate films such as Napoleon Dynamite with autistic perspective and share that event, or host Autistic Pride events in London, Lincoln, Cambridge… Spalding?

The answer to all this is to listen, not division, or indifference…but acceptance.

 

July 2019 - Tribal Dreams

The Going Forward Music Festival and Little Miracles Fun Day are top of the agenda this week because not only were they happy events to attend and participate in, but they also illustrated the big picture of Lincolnshire's community and its services.

A man serving me coffee from one of the various catering options informed that last year at the Going Forward Music Festival, I was thinking of starting a support group for autistic adults.

This year, we WERE there and selling our wares.

Amongst them were my books, dreamcatchers and Sylvia The Swan.

The lucky dip we had proved most popular but I would have felt equally as fortunate without it as the company I shared was immensely satisfying. Back to Sylvia later…

Another full circle moment for the tribe!

Tonic Health was the venue for Little Miracles and Going Forward Social Group and back when Autistic Led was getting off the ground, I always viewed each of them with admiration and wanted to add my own tales to their success stories.

This weekend was the culmination of our recent efforts to collaborate and is only the start.

Going Forward has since moved premises to The Priory School (amazing move!) and I am so proud of what the entire festival squad achieved this past weekend and I know they will continue to thrive.

I feel like any strides that Going Forward make is a step forward for us all…

 

It was a long day from 10.30am to 6pm for us at Autistic Led but it was onto the Little Miracles Fun Day on Sunday.

Viking and Star Wars re-enactments, face painters, food, a smidgen of poetry by yours truly and an epic battle between Star Wars Storm Troopers and Vikings (you read that right) were some of the highlights event.

The rebellious mood of Little Miracles to push on, in spite of the weather not appealing to some, was something to behold and it was a fantastic conglomerate of activity.

I respect everyone's sacrificial desire to make things happen for the benefits of Lincolnshire's most vulnerable.

 

Now, although I am not their father….(Star Wars anyone?) I must conclude by printing for history's sake my absolute joy and pride in all that The Tribe (Autistic Led) did this past weekend.

We are not even a year old and we have expanded rather tremendously and they have all done so much more for my personal state of mind than I will ever be able to capture in words.

My deepest thanks to the autistic people I work with, now and in the future, your impact on me is immortal.



July 2019 - Transition Day

Alan Turing, a gay and autistic man, has been put on the £50 note. WHAT!

This happens around the time of what I’ve seen termed as ‘Transition Day’ to describe primary school pupils moving onto secondary school. It’s significant to mention this because having Alan Turing, widely regarded as the ‘father of modern computing,’ is a transition in history and I do not doubt that many more young minds will learn about this icon with a new layer to his life.

He may have been learning his own enigma code of life and how his brain worked but, kin to the computers he fixed and fiddled with without bringing attention to his myriad accomplishments as a master of his craft, he could be described as ‘shut down.’ Broken down.

The gay and autistic communities share a very similar story of oppression with conversion therapies, crimes committed against us or in the case of Alan Turing, driven us to end our own lives.

It is not appropriate to co-opt a ‘pride’ trend on Twitter but it cannot be denied that there is certain solidarity in rejecting the injustices we have historically (and currently) endured.

So this particular transition in history takes us from history into the future.

The immediate future, to mean this weekend on Saturday, July 27, holds the Going Forward Music Festival for people with learning disabilities, where Autistic Led will have a stall and all involved will represent our county with pride.

The day after, Sunday, July 28, Little Miracles’ Family Fun Day will feature an opening speech/poems from yours truly and together as a united front, Autistic Led and Little Miracles will represent our county with pride.

Tonic Health once had all three of these groups at their venue and I feel very proud to be working with all of these community lanterns in Lincolnshire, lighting the path to access and advocacy up gold.

But being proud of where we are does not mean we can ignore the past. We must use it to our advantage and remember to mourn deaths, celebrate lives and create better futures.

Alan Turing, and his story, will be broken down once again... but this time, his name and his story will create change...

August 2019 - Where Are The Autistics?

I was at a family friend’s 18th birthday this past weekend, albeit taking time out every so often because of the social integration, and had parkour training in the sand dunes and have thoroughly refreshed myself for the week ahead.

How have your weekends been? Let me know by contacting me or the editor Jeremy Ransome in the Letters To The Editor section of the paper you’re holding!

This is one of those times because fellow autistic advocate and ally Sara Harvey has been working a lot in Paris recently with the amazing Louis Brunel of Crimson AU, had her work translated into Spanish and performed her first ever live street performance in her home city of Chester.

She’s getting around and it’s inspiring!

As she says in one of her recent headlines ‘I’m not hiding online anymore!’

While there is a certain unity in the online worlds of social media advocacy, communities such as Autistic Empire and many more ways to impact the world we all live in, the offline world is important to reach too.

As Sara says in her live street performance entitled ‘Where Are The Autistics?’ she considers herself a ‘privileged autistic’ and this is not to mean that she is BETTER than any other autistic person who may have their own journey to undergo with diagnosis, education and family acceptance to name a few common issues, but to say that when you have a platform like she has or like I do, it is crucial that that we share messages that authentically represent our autistic community.

There is power in both online and offline worlds, let’s not get it twisted; I’ve spent most of my childhood social time online and I won’t have anyone invalidate those experiences.

No one should invalidate autistic experiences and instead I believe we must unify and continue to spread autistically authentic messages across the world (and with my recently renewed passport arriving, best believe I will be travelling A LOT).

 

A balance between online and offline must be struck as moderation is a positive attribute to healthy and sustainable lives.

However, if the answer to ‘Where Are The Autistics?’ is ‘Playing Fortnite’ or ‘Sitting on her computer all day’ then we still must listen.

Sometimes, it’s okay to stay in your comfort zone and actually use that as an advantage, a springboard to new paths in life that develop AROUND the comfort zone. A game designer/tester, a coder, a soundtrack recordist, a tournament champion YouTube sensation….

Reiterating the message from my 2017 TEDx talk in Norwich, it’s integral to ‘Make mountains out of molehills.’

Autistic people are offline and online with potential shooting towards the skyline if we only look for them.

Sara Harvey AKA Agony Autie, Emma Dalmayne, Kieran Rose, Hannah Molesworth, Fiona O’Leary and so many more people have sacrificed for our community gain and I for one thank them for their tireless efforts for a safer, sustainable and beautifully autistic future.

Where Are The Autistics?

Ready and waiting.

August 2019 - Stars, Miracles And Me

To recap from last week, we have launched the 100 Day Community Kit; a positive take on an outdated concept which is explained further on the Facebook page now set up.

In summary, there are eight sections to the kit with the aim of 100 positives and helpful tips about being autistic and our communities as a whole for each section. 

800 in total…is that possible? Section 1 is ‘What is autism?’ I tell my tribe to dream big and I must lead by example, hey… This week has been very exciting and new with Autistic Led as we’ve been working on some secret projects I can’t mention more about….

TEASE!

It’s been a very positive week and next week we will have our monthly film night.

And it’s not just Autistic Led that is expanding. It’s Rainbow Stars in Sleaford and Little Miracles South Holland. They are both looking for new ‘hubs’ which is extremely intriguing!

Rainbow Stars are a bunch of, well, Rainbow Stars, in the Lincolnshire galaxy and work tirelessly to connect services dotted within it.

‘The Hub will support people with additional needs to socialize and interact with others on a daily basis. It will have a sensory area as well as outdoor sensory activities, home educated children with SEN will be welcome. We hold arts and crafts sessions and learning opportunities.’

Little Miracles’ Elizabeth and Marc Kilbon, stellar parents and advocates for children everywhere, tell us on their JustGiving page that ‘Our aim in the future is to have our own building with sensory room, where the parents can come and unwind, where people looking for advice can pop in a for a friendly chat, where our team can meet and discuss fundraising or plans ahead...'

Additional needs affects more people than everyone realises, support in Lincolnshire is lacking, we want to fill that gap and be there.’

I can’t take the excitement…but none of this will happen without the community’s support and tangible actions.

We can unify over pets, the care of the elderly, bad parking, potholes, the lack of police presence…why not these valuable causes?

And I think that’s all I have this week because I can lead a horse to water, horses being readers in this instance, but I can’t make you drink.

 

August 2019 - Family History

I am glad that I didn’t write this on Friday, as planned, and wrote it on Sunday instead because I’ve just got back from my brother’s wedding and I felt inspired.

Inspired by many of the usual feelings one tends to feel around weddings; the joys and celebration of reuniting with the family you know and the family you don’t know so well in the name of creating a new branch to your tree.

 

But I was also inspired by my neurotypical AKA non-autistic brother (to simplify things) because when we were growing up together, there was such an age difference that I never felt we got to truly ‘connect.’ He was the sibling that teased, I was the mentally delicate recipient of his very normal games, jokes etc. I’m not saying he dunked my head in bins, played rough with me or anything major but even the slightest tease from him didn’t gel well with how my brain is wired and my experiences in life.

 

He was on to uni and travelling all over the world with skiing and I was still finding my entry route into adulthood, in the airport of life, waiting to fly.

This all came full circle in the poem I performed on the Saturday afternoon where I mentioned ‘jessy’ and ‘buttnoid’ – nicknames for me for whatever bizarre reason.

 

Note: If anyone got called that as a kid, let me know as it’s a fascinating appellation with origins unknown to me at time of writing.

Seeing my brother confident, choked-up and ecstatic all in one evening and hearing people in his life speak and meeting his friends and Risa’s friends, all brought me closer to my relationship with him.

It also made me think about my relationships with people. I was mesmerized by the photo display that adorned a corner of the restaurant-cum-dancehall area, if you will, where we had our evening meal.

I couldn’t stop looking at the images that captured Aaron and Risa’s life together and visually bonded me to their journey and I thought about having that for myself.

I’m currently single and this is not a Plenty Of Fish plea, despite it being the Internet... but when I saw what Aaron and Risa had been doing with their lives in that form, it hit home.

If I marry, who will give speeches at my wedding? What stories will they tell of me? How many people will be there? Probably not many but not because of loneliness.

My brother’s wedding, though informal, which I loved, was extremely socially demanding for me as we went from ‘intimate’ pub to ‘intimate’ wedding ceremony to ‘intimate’ bus ride to the final evening meal and dance that followed.

But you see, that takes a lot out of me and it was at the wedding ceremony when Aaron asked ‘Are you feeling overwhelmed?’ that almost made me cry.

Because that question, simply to ask, meant everything to me.

I actually wasn’t okay at the time but I managed to stay in the room, perform my piece and get on with the day (wine sipping – okay, chugging maybe - and chatting to my grandmother on a bus through London was utter bliss).

 

I remember many of Aaron’s friends asking if I’m okay throughout the day. I remember Risa’s mum putting the flower through my jacket before the ceremony. I remember so many little interactions or things that happened that day and I am so grateful for everyone.

It certainly was a weekend when I was challenged but, like depression, anxieties that have kept me housebound, feeling like an outsider…I survived and I will keep thriving in life.

This is not a pity party. This is a declaration.

I will continue to rise above and push forward because I’ve come too far not to.

Regarding my times of struggle during the event, his sister said to me words to the effect of ‘At least you know now that you need to get out’ literally after I’d thought the exact same thing.

And I am getting out. Getting out to collaborate and uplift the tribe of Autistic Led, my adult support group. Getting out to meet people that I can potentially share my life with, friends and otherwise.

And soon, getting out to travel the world, like my brother does because it wasn’t long ago that I renewed my passport and it has since arrived.

In the airport of life, 1 day, I will indeed fly.


September 2019 - The Humanity Switch

Imagine the most intense feelings you’ve ever felt. Towards a person, an experience, anything whatsoever that made you feel intense. A busted tap with only newspaper to unblock it. A fire alarm you don’t know the code for. The wildest ocean’s undercurrent you are hopelessly lost in. That is the relationship I have with my emotions.

It can be almost impossible to wrench my obsessional compulsive thoughts from the grip of my emotions and more often than not it’s about people. Being so in tune can make for a horrible loop. I do believe that my immense passion comes from past pain and it can be so draining. It leaves me feeling stressed because, whilst I know I cannot help and connect with everyone, I still want to do my damn best!

This emotional turmoil combined with my poor executive functioning skills (planning, organizing and executing) makes for a chaotic mind. Can anyone relate? I also have massive issues with indecision and have used a coin toss to decide where to spend my evening a few times before, it’s been that annoying. I just... have no idea!

The power of love may make Frankie Go To Hollywood but it makes Callum go to hell. I get overpowered with love without the social tools to hold back, for better or worse, and sometimes I wish I could turn off the humanity switch. But at least I’m alive, ticking on.



September 2019 -  Rural Roots Of Autistic Led

I want to chat this week about Autistic Led. You would have seen that there is new funding available via the Autism Network Funding and I am feeling extremely reflective on the way Autistic Led’s tree has grown.

I have always seen Autistic Led as a tree with the community rooted in the autistic identity but branching out in ways that matter to us (the autistic community). We have organically developed from three members to double digits and as we approach our one year anniversary in October, I think about the reason this all started. The seeds. The rural roots of it all. My own autistic journey.

Lincolnshire’s public transport has been heavily criticised for so long so I won’t flog a dead horse but public transport does indeed have a direct impact on Autistic Led. The autistic community can already feel isolated socially so when services that can connect are struggling, it has a knock-on effect.

But it’s also part of the authentic nature of the beast. Any gap in opportunity is an opportunity to fill it. I don’t feel like we have, or will ever, reach our potential as a support group but there are absolutely fundamental components of our tree that have yet to thrive. Autistic Led operates currently on a three-tier canopy, to stick with the tree theme, and that means that there are three ways to connect and collaborate with us. The physical group, the Facebook group and the WhatsApp group. All of these are completely valid and wonderful ways to connect.

The physical group once held at Tonic Health, the health and wellbeing hub opposite Spalding Bowl.
The Facebook group is one of the online ways of connecting but it’s not as personal as the WhatsApp group.
The WhatsApp group is a personal messaging service so your phone number is required and isn’t for everyone. But that’s how Autistic Led has adapted and will continue to adapt to the needs of its people and the environment in which they live.

Trees have to grow in the right conditions and you have to look after them to a point. I say, to a point, because there is appeal in letting a tree go wild. I truly believe that the rural roots of Autistic Led, and the organic but steady foundation of it all, has meant that Autistic Led will go wild as we approach our one year anniversary in October. The journey may vary but it is always Autistic Led.

 

September 2019 - European Evolution

It’s been the weekend of Autism-Europe’s triennial conference, lasting from September 13-15, with the focal point being ‘New dynamic for change and inclusion'.

It’s a big deal in Europe and I have a desire to be there one day but for now, I am reporting from the comfort of my home. It’s intensely interesting to me because here in Spalding’s community, we have a diverse mix of nationalities and I do believe that there is a need to look at the various cultural relationships that exist within these nationalities.

The need to expand our knowledge and application of that knowledge about autistic people may be met more appropriately in some areas of the world than in others, purely based on the access to resources (books, diagnostic processes, platforms such as art etc) and this is not an easy issue to fix but over time, generations of informed people and places to connect like Autism-Europe can prove beneficial.

There are examples already being set.

Louis Brunel, from Crimson Au in France notably stood up during discredited doctor Andrew Wakefield’s talk which was widely received with appreciation from the autistic community because of Wakefield’s smudge on the history of how autistic people have been, and still are, being perceived with regards to vaccines ‘causing’ autism.

Crimson Au is an autistic-led organization that gives authentic voice to autistic people and continues to provide for the community.

In Poland, there is Fundacja Prodeste and Jasna Stona Spektrum which are projects doing fantastic work based around actually autistic Polish natives (and were attendees at the Autism-Europe Congress!)

I am also keen on Auticon Ltd which is all about utilizing autistic people’s talents in tech and this company spans from Germany and France (Europe) to further afield like Switzerland and Canada.

It feels to me like we need, or perhaps sit in the middle of, a European Evolution. We’ve already evolved as a world from our past treatments of autistic people but joining up as much as possible can only do more good.

Long-term readers of Autistic Lincs may recall my column on a project called Rainbow Hands;
It is a project designed to accept, connect, enable and empower autistic people and the people in their lives in communities where English is not a primary language. It was pencilled in to reveal itself at the Education Awards in 2018 but for multiple reasons, including the difficulties with establishing a team of committed translators, it hasn’t taken off... yet.

As we move on from the Autism-Europe Congress, there were apparent highs and lows.

Some intriguing points in the online discussion seem to have been everything from keynote speeches entitled ‘Empowerment of persons on the autism spectrum within an inclusive society; What should it look like?’ and conversations around sexuality and the importance of focusing on quality of life and functioning instead of deficits and symptoms.

Very positive steps indeed and only with Rainbow Hands of unity between all cultures that exist in Spalding, indeed the entire South Holland area, can we walk together for this European Evolution.

September 2019 - Tip Of The Thunberg

You may have heard of Greta Thunberg, a young autistic activist. You do now.

But why?

 

Is it because she’s young that her voice is heard?

Is it because she is autistic that she is in the news?

To quote my wonderful Lithuanian friend; 'Why are you special if you are autistic?’

We’ll come back to this.

For now, I want to tell you about the #ClimateStrike and #Fridays4Future gatherings all across the world that happened this past Friday.

By the time you’ve read this, there would have been a casual meeting around the Red Lion Hotel in Spalding to show support for our world and its future.

We have so many natural resources to use and yet we have collectively made bad decisions after allowing them to have been made in the past. They are now impacting on our future, from using plastics and burning rainforests to killing off animals for prizes, to name a few.

What will standing around do to solve these generational problems? Nothing.

 

If we are not prepared to have open conversations about issues that do not only affect us, but people that come after us, how can we even make a start

on action?

 

The gathering in Spalding on Friday shows that we care.

Other news that catches my attention and, as always, it’s impossible to condense it all into a neat little package, is Inspector Gareth Boxall standing up for CCTV.

This is tangible action but it speaks to how we will capture potential crime, specifically in Greta’s case, hate crime.

Greta has conflicts with journalists because of her autistic nature and people coming to conclusion about her, further highlighting the need for education and its application around autistic people.

Closed minds often open a can of worms.

I won’t relive the media mayhem but, in contrast, focus on the appropriate coverage from all of Greta’s past encounters and her speeches which are better ways to remember her.

Those speeches are well-documented and so by simply typing in her name, it will bring up vast amounts of articles.

Returning to the questions asked earlier; Is it because she’s young that her voice is heard?

Is it because she is autistic that she is in the news?

Does it inspire me to know that at 16 years old, Greta is inspiring others to make change? Yes.

Does it make me happy that an autistic individual is quite possibly at the helm of climate change action, or at the very least, the latest spokesperson to push

this agenda? Yes.

Why are you special if you are autistic?

As I explained to the same friend, autistic people have endured a historic struggle to share the narrative of autistic adults.

So when someone can break through those perceived barriers and say ‘Hello, I’m here!’, I will celebrate it.

And as my friend replied and concluded in a conversation we had last week, it comes down to this..."If someone is doing good things and is active, I agree that needs to be supported."

Her age and her brain are inextricable features of her identity as we know it now and whilst Greta will get older, she will remain autistic and just like

the autistic identity and the autistic individual, you cannot have one without the other.

We must act in the interests of everyone, even if many of us do not believe it matters right now, because we are building a sustainable future and you cannot have climate change without it.

Believe me, this is the tip of the Thunberg.



September 2019 - Stories Yet To Tell

This Thursday will see the first anniversary of the support group, Autistic Led, which to follow our theme from last week, has been a professional and personal evolution.

Much like the simple email that I sent to (Free Press editor) Jeremy Ransome which rippled into creating and sustaining this column, the support group was built on a simple story of one man wanting to help a community he thought existed.

And each new individual that came along, whether it was through overlapping services, the Autistic Lincs column or some other way, validated and expanded the soil of the Autistic Led tree.

 

Have I got it all right? In my mind, no.

Have I learned more about others and myself? Absolutely.

Will I continue to learn? Of course.

And another full circle moment occurred on Saturday - The Pride Of South Holland Awards.

Tonic Health, the charity under which Autistic Led resides, was nominated for the Local Charity Champion award.

Brilliant in its own right but what makes it ironic for me is that Bakkavor are the sponsor.

Bakkavor was a proving ground for me in terms of testing my capacity for holding down a paid job.

 

Maybe I will dedicate a column to those days at some point but it taught me so much about myself and to have my worlds merge, whether Tonic Health won or not, is completely bizarre to me but I love it.

I don’t know how we will celebrate the anniversary AK autiversary but Tonic Health is a stellar team of people that have all contributed to the infrastructure of Autistic Led. It may be an informal chat with the receptionists, talking business with Michael or being criticized for my coffee-making skills, I have shared so many moments.

So, if we have won an award, it will be an embodiment of all the individuals at Tonic Health, the wider community of allies and associates and my dear Autistic Led tribe, coming together as a whole.

Rainbow Stars have their five year anniversary on November 1 and will be opening a hub in Sleaford the day after on November 2. The mayor is opening it for them and whilst there is a lot of work left to do before it’s fully functioning, it’s another example of something beautiful.

In other news, the Polish advocacy organization I mentioned last in European Evolution, have a headquarters so check out the link below too!

I am not intentionally leaving out the great work that Going Forward, Little Miracles and no doubt other ventures that successfully apply for the Autism Network Funding will do (deadline is October 10).

But this really is a special week for me as I have recently started a new role as a support worker and Autistic Led is thriving one year on.

Crazy.

Next on the agenda is an open mic night on October 10 at Sergi’s Tapas Bar.

In my first ever Autistic Lincs column, I told you how autism is a human story.

Adding so much more depth to that, in the case of Autistic Led and its upcoming autiversary, the autistic people are the most poignant storytellers.

And there are many more stories yet to tell.

October 2019 - 

It’s Autism Hour this week all over the place which means a few hours of the day will be ‘autism-friendly’, and it has the support of The Governess of The Chase fame Anne Hegerty. PS still have a dream of going on for my and my grandma’s sake!

I’ve criticized the NAS (National Autistic Society) in the past but I’ll praise them here; it’s a good move (and I won’t go deeper into that and ruin people’s days…)

However, what is funny to me is that years ago, before I became a columnist for Lincolnshire Free Press, I was trying to push a campaign of my own around this and I’d like to bring it back into focus this weekend and moving forward.

#ShopabilitynotSTOPability was a hashtag (Twitter-speak) which I wanted to use as a leverage point to have conversations with the Spalding community about shop accessibility.

If you are not familiar with social media, the idea was to create a catchy phrase that would pull people in and use that as an opportunity to have conversations about accessibility in shops and in stores generally.

So why don’t we re-ignite this simple idea but go even bigger? I’m talking South Holland-wide!

I would love you, the readers and consumers of this column, to let me know which stores deserve to be recognised for their ‘shopability.’

Has a staff member treated you amazingly well when your child has had a meltdown?

Are there stores that have a brilliant autism-friendly or disability-friendly atmosphere?

What areas in South Holland deserve to be recognized for their helpful attitude/disability access?

Could South Holland do better and if so….how?

Let me know!

Also, please continue to support my 100 Day Community Kit – a toolkit of helpful tips and tools based around autistic people and their communities.

Currently, we’re on Section 4: Treating Stress

Add your tips and tools on stress factors for autistic people, treating that stress and shed light on what works for you as a family as well as many other sections still to by searching for the 100 day community tool kit on Facebook.

 

October 2019 - Renovations

I have renovated my flat with new sofas and a PS3 together with childhood game series The Sly Cooper Collection. I am ecstatic about this change because it completes the transformation of my accommodation, not that I was moving elsewhere, but it means that I can enjoy my independence a little bit more.

 

I began dabbling in painting since my ex-girlfriend and I parted ways (peacefully but emotional nonetheless) and this is the culmination of that process, in my mind.

I have yet to make it to Joey’s art exhibition as life has got in the way but it reaches the end of its mini tour around Spalding this Sunday at Springfields Events Centre.

I do love to see artists thriving and last week I was reminded that they can at Sergi’s Tapas Bar’s open mic night with local writing group White Horse Writers.

Across the way is #PE11 – the pub to Sup, Graze, Unfurl and Cackle AKA Drink, Eat, Relax and Laugh.

I stand firm in my belief that the area of Spalding off the Hole In The Wall passage is the best part of Spalding. You have so much culture and connection to the community with Lincolnshire Free Press’ headquarters and Amici adding to what I believe to the unofficial arts hub of our town.

Despite the many live bands that play throughout the town, all doing their absolute best and succeeding in their efforts to put themselves and the town on the map, I can only speak for myself when I say that there is something unique in what the places I referenced above.

Spalding, especially online, has had pockets of moaning and at times absolute mire but think that there is something to be said for artists that are, in a way, called to action because of their environment and Joey is one of several people that I know personally that is making their voices heard.

Back to the open mic night at Sergi’s, a monthly affair with a special Stars In Your Eyes special in the works, I was once again blessed with the company of many of my support group, my tribe.

I am still overwhelmed by how these people came to be in my life and they totally enrich my existence. Autistic Led is formally having a renovation of its own with funding but aren’t we all?

I’m single, in my own flat, for the first time in my life when I feel that I am in my own skin.

 

I’m getting emotional writing this but life is at an all time high with everyone currently in it and everyone that has passed through it.

This weekend I am painting and decorating my grandma’s place alongside my dad and who has had a passenger-side view of my journey to hell and into heaven and it’s truly a picture of many generations to behold. I will also be seeing my brother and, as I talk about in Family History (Autistic Lincs, Lincolnshire Free Press, August 26) has travelled with me on a different trajectory for several years only to have our relationship united in clear focus now.

I will make a column about Halloween, don’t worry, but I am personally looking ahead to Christmas; how I will spend it and with whom.

Till then, I keep using my words, my art, to paint myself OUT of a corner.

It’s not only my grandma’s wall that’s being

redecorated. It’s my life and home is where the art is.


October 2019 - Music Is Not Just For Ambience

I cannot believe that I haven't written more about this before and I've written about my social misfirings despite my dancing bringing people into my world, and of course I've written about Chloe, whose idea I heard it was to dance behind the bar of Bentley's where I often let loose, but I do not recall going into detail about how it feels.

In one word; free.

 

But it wasn't always that way when my dad would accompany me to dance lessons only to have me stand or sit at the back of the hall space, lost.

The feeling of freedom and the feeling of being lost are very similar in nature, aren't they?

I could just as easily be lost in the rhythms, vibrations and emotions of the dance floor soundtrack as I am free to move my body to those same rhythms, vibrations and emotions.

'Not all that wander are lost' I believe the common expression is and that definitely explains me.

Dance is a beautiful unspoken language.

 

Music is like water and we are like Bruce Lee becoming like water, my friends...

If you don't get the reference, let me attempt to explain.

Bruce Lee famously talked about form and how yet we are formless. Much like when water becomes the shape in which it is poured like a cup or any other vessel, our bodies are vessels for music to fill.

Recently, I came across a video my father and I made five years ago entitled 'because music is not just for ambience...' and it's hit 10,000 views on Facebook at the time of writing this column. It's me performing in a Peterborough shop (I don't remember which) and I have shared it on the then-Spotted: Spalding page and in other places.

It's a short little clip of me doing what my dad likes to call 'the sideways moonwalk' which is neither here nor there for me but he is always asking me to do it...(have I unleashed something terrible now that you know, readers....it was a blissful moment).

Anyway, my point is that I absolute believe that music is not just for ambience and shops, streets and the like are basically just enormous dance floors!

 

It's fitting to mention shops and Chloe all in one column as my#ShopabilitynotSTOPability campaign continues (does shop and service accessibility ever stop?) but I would like to take time to mention the town centre's Costa and The Ivy Wall.

Between Mr Chai Latte, Mr 13 Guns and Mr Brazzo, I can only hope to rival Marshall Mathers' alter egos Slim Shady and Eminem with my beverage buddies!

On a serious note, all of their staff have always been great to me and their businesses hold key memories in my heart.

Costa: Several poems written and conversations had with friends and colleagues alike, Got my dream job...

The Ivy Wall; First girlfriend, festival committee meetings, a couple of interesting quiz nights, several poems having been written literally at the bar.

But I started this column writing about dance and how it makes me feel.

All the memories I've had on the dance floor, people I've seen, people I've danced with, selfies that have been taken, laughs that have been shared, passion I have observed in other people dancing, the passion I show, the inner demons I have released by almost dancing them out of me....

Dance is one big memory that is great to capture on video, in shops and streets but sometimes it's fine just to be..in the moment.

Because music isn't just for ambience and dance isn't just for a memory to hold onto...

Dance is a memory of how it feels to be lost...and free.


October 2019 - Halloween

Halloween this week. When we sexualize nurses and paint pumpkins BLUE!

Okay, so I have mixed feelings about this ‘holiday’ for a range of reasons so if you want to enjoy Halloween without a buzz kill and a downer on things…stop reading.

Now we’ve cleared that up, the primary purpose of Halloween or so I thought, was to be scared.

 

It’s a surprise then to know that a Big Head Evil Gnome and an Inflatable Alien turn up after searching ‘Popular Halloween costumes 2019.’

Go on, do it. You’ll see.

And I’ve been in shops and seen in films that ‘hot zombies’ and sexy nurses exist among the array of designs to adorn one’s body.

 

Am I aroused by women? Yes.

Should I be aroused by someone who, out of the context of this ‘scary’ holiday, is there to save my life?

I don’t think so. It’s very odd and conflicting.

Would most of us know that, if we were dying and needed a nurse, sexual behaviour isn't socially appropriate? Probably yes because I’m willing to bet that, when you’re at risk of losing your life, real-life situations and emotions overpower those sensations.

Having a sports injury and being conscious whilst a professional or a friend rubbing some ointment in or whatever and I’m also willing to bet that some people would take advantage of the situation in the name of being ‘cheeky’ or ‘having a laugh.’

This isn’t just at Halloween and I could mention bartenders, office staff and police officers here to make my point.

Why is it okay for adults to dress up in these guises that have extremely serious roles in society for the sake of ‘fun?’ How are we communicating the difference to those who may be unable to filter what is contextually appropriate or not?

 

An autistic man with an associated learning difficulty may see a nurse looking sexy at Halloween, get aroused, and then apply that mental image to an actual hospital nurse doing her job and potentially be deemed inappropriate.

You would hope that the hospital would be made aware of any associated learning difficulties or differences in perception/communication but this doesn’t always happen and people are messed about, victimized, discriminated against and excluded from society.

 

So many mixed messages.

I’m not saying to censor all of Halloween but I just find it fascinating how we deliver these messages and expect others to know when to filter them.

And the mixed messages continue with blue pumpkins.

Now then, I’m not a fan of the colour blue when it’s about representing autistic people…in fact it DOESN’T represent autistic people.

It represents Autism Speaks and its approach to autistic people and I can never support that.

Blue pumpkins are, from what I can understand, a symbol to the public that you are autistic and therefore it’s better to adopt a different approach to the typical trick or treat. Sounds good, right?

The further you delve into the issue, I’m reading about the symbol being easier to single out autistic people for potential hate crime and, again, the history of the colour blue. Why blue!?

Red and gold are my colours of choice with the infinity symbol being my symbol of choice over the puzzle piece.

But honestly, I have had to filter the social media blitz out of my life in regards to the pumpkins and A LOT of other things.

More and more, I find myself filtering the world out of my life because if I didn’t, my life would be absorbed in so much news, so many causes and I can’t be dealing with it.

I cannot stress enough how bad my executive functioning can be (skills in planning, organizing and executing) and adding to that, the politics of the autistic community and communities in general.

How do I filter the awful murder case of Zoe Whitford, the atrocities of the Judge Rotenberg Center, blue pumpkins and ABA which all affect the wider community and dance, parkour and relationships which are individually important factors in my life into one readable column?

How do you filter all of that?

After I write this column, and probably after you’ve read it too, I’m going for a walk.

It’s 12 at night. I don’t care.

I NEED space. Not cyberspace. Personal. Space.

I try my best to spread these issues across several columns and give everyone an insight and, with a year in columns, I’d say I’m doing pretty well, but sometimes exposure is so much worse than not knowing.

As if I’m actually scared by a film and closing my eyes, that’s how I feel sometimes with what I have to filter in and out of my life.

Ignorance really is bliss.

I guess I’m trying to say that with the social complexities of life already, Halloween and the politics of the community I engage with as an autistic man and just as a man in society, I’m like Stephen King.

Figuring It out.

 

 

November 2019 - Solidarity With Sleaford

The Rainbow Stars Disability Hub is open!

The Sleaford-based charity headed up by Jane Peck and supported by her team have been shining for five years with the hub being a culmination of that work.

I spent my Saturday morning in a room buzzing with energy, packed with generations of people from children to older individuals, on 2 Kesteven Street next to North Kesteven District Council.

An extremely accessible venue which lends itself beautifully to the established National Centre for Craft and Design (NCCD) across a car park and is simply known to me as the arts centre.

The more I’m in Sleaford, the deeper in love I seem to fall with the arts centre being a consistent part of that pleasure and the Rainbow Stars Disability Hub is only going to add to that.

I am immensely proud of Rainbow Stars’ achievement on a personal level but I also feel great pride in the town of Sleaford and its people for recognising a need and creating something wonderful in response.

Speaking of Spalding specifically, whilst I do believe the foundation is there for making things happen, we have yet to create a hub like Rainbow Stars.

The Mayor Of Sleaford cut the rope to welcome us officially to the hub and I smiled at pictures showing David Snape and I in rainbow wigs at a charity event for Rainbow Stars, immersed myself in the sense of community and felt the reverberations of good vibes.

Contributing to the environment with a certain appeal....were bananas marked with motivational quotes such as ‘Be yourself’ and ‘Believe.’

Both the foyer where we waited and the hub itself, once we were filling the space, were very busy and I think that all involved did very well to manage the people and regulate any anxieties and sensory needs they may have been handling.

Moving forward, Rainbow Stars will be doing their absolute best to ensure that their solid and clear support base is catered for; And I believe they will!

 

Closer to home, Going Forward and Little Miracles had their Halloween parties whilst Autistic Led had a themed film night. Serving our local community is something close to all of our hearts and it’s integral to the national picture that we carry on with our efforts.

In some other news, November is Autistic History Month. A month to remember our culture’s history and people that played prominent roles in it. The people we’ve lost and the people we have. The events that changed our world, for better and for worse, and to bring us together for a more enlightened and empowered future. The closures of facilities like Willowbrook State School in America, the ongoing tragedies at the Judge Rotenberg Center, the puzzle piece and Infinity symbol respectively and their very different impacts on our community and culture.

 

From Judy Singer coining the term ‘neurodiversity’ to Emma Dalmayne and Fiona O’Leary who have sacrificed their spoons (makes sense if you know about spoon theory) for autistic rights and against the bleach curists of the world.

And Sara Jane Harvey who at the time of writing, has closed down her page due to trolling...

But her work lives on and the legacy we leave is based on acknowledging the past, learning from it, and applying it in new ways for the future.

Technology has advanced to a place where it’s easier to share, like and comment on the work we all do and put into projects, for better but sometimes worse, and I am very fortunate to have my Facebook outlet as well as the more traditional newspaper piece.

I will be doing what I can to share with you all the blogs of my colleagues and friends in the hope that you can use these authentic insights to construct services that work best for us.

Let me know the services that work best for you as autistic people Section 5: Service Spotlight on the 100 Day Community Kit this week!

Jane and Team Rainbow Stars have such a passion for what they do and by always wanting to hear from people like myself and David, it really is a marriage made in Heaven. There’s a galaxy of connections to make in this world and I so happy that we have Rainbow Stars.



November 2019 - Wraps 2 Raps

My story has been told various times in many rhymes and referenced a fair few times in these columns.

But in honour of Autistic History Month, I wanted to share my journey of finding and keeping work.

It started in a factory. Making wraps.

 

Considering that writing poetry was my creative catharsis, it is such an appropriate image to conjure up.

It was my first paid job at the age of 25 years old.

Relationships. Jobs. Living on my own.

I was a late bloomer in most major aspects of my life but oh how I have blossomed like the tree outside my dad’s place. All the typical hallmarks of a ‘good’ life have been difficult to capture but have been achieved and it is the journey itself that has infused me with the incredibly powerful optimism and mindset I have today.

I am now working as a support worker for Sense, a charity that empowers people and connects through sight, sound and life.

In more details, this means that they help to ‘support people with complex disabilities or who are deafblind.’ An awesome job pathway to follow in general but one with personal significance for me and my autistic identity.

I feel like this year is going so right and as Christmas comes around and the world gets ready to restart its cycle that people carve out their own meanings for, I am reinvigorated for life.

My transition to Sense has been intriguing in that it’s a new venture in my life with personal and professional opportunities for growth being ripe for my picking such as learning more about the rich variety of ways we interact with the world as well as potentially running the London Marathon.

The London Marathon is something I’ve never truly considered before Sense and I’ve been critical of many charities in the past due to the history of my people and the way they can be represented, or misrepresented, through puzzle pieces or lighting up blue or having autistic adults’ voices muted in favour of parents, carers and teachers.

We all have a voice, of course, but history hasn’t reflected that which leaves a lot of autistic people bitter/passionate about changing that narrative.

 

Sense is nothing to complain about and my voice feels heard here.

I will only seek to amplify the autistic voice and the voices of those who are not given ample chances to speak their truth.

That is in the future, where I intend to stay with Sense, but my truth is that I am only here now because of my poetry pushing me forward to a place where I’m capable of making a change.

So you really could say that my raps…made Sense.


November 2019 - Write The Future

Hierarchy. This idea that there are rankings, levels, layers to things. There is the Royal Family and The British Government and there is us, the people on the ground who are subject to their rulings.

The teachers teach and the students learn. That’s how our education system works and we all accept that. But sometimes, rules are inverted and the teachers get stuck in their ways and are unable to accept that the student knows the best way forward.

The most prominent example I can bring to light is technology.

 

Teachers from older generations did not have the access to it that the young generations do. However, we don’t have to phase out the older generation completely and instead we can create dialogue between the generations and work with those that want to accept the generational shifts and find a balance.

A pen and notebook will always be my favoured creative utensils but I can see the benefits of computer typing, especially as it relates to typing up books and getting your poems across to a wider community more immediately as well as the Touch-Screen and Voice-Activated equipment that enables more opportunities for communication.

Just like the balance we have to strike as a society that is becoming closer to nature and our impact on it with the impact of Greta Thunberg and her following both online and offline, I am reminded this week that you need to create a dialogue between neurodivergent (including autistic) people and neurotypical (non-autistic/allistic) people in order to make those necessary shifts, in this case, with the culture.

It’s Autistic History Month and the most important shift in my autistic culture is that of the mindset.

The puzzle piece symbol that so many people blindly put on a pedestal has a hugely offensive history relating to autistic people ‘missing’ something.

To those people thinking that we can simply move past that symbol or even to redefine it, many autistic people cannot, will not, and trust me when I tell you that my reaction is ‘mild’ in comparison to others.

And I think it’s the mildness and the middle ground I reside in that enable me to see both sides (not that it’s any easier for me.)

I am fiercely loyal to my tribe, my autistic community, but sometimes neurotypical people simply don’t have the access to information about the puzzle piece symbol or the colour blue that we often ‘light up.’ Both represent the idea of ‘curing’ what isn’t a disease (taken from my Masking poem formerly on the Autistic Led YouTube channel) and that autistic mind.

 

But to be partners in mind, we have to acknowledge the deep neural routines we form, meaning that we cannot let the autistic history of the horrific deaths, treatment in the public sector from schools and colleges to police officers and the myriad injustices affect autistic futures. There are good people on both ‘sides’ of the story, autistic and neurotypical.

I know that I wouldn’t be where I am without my dad and many close family members and friends, most of whom would sit on the neurotypical side of the fence (and that’s okay!)

 

My first girlfriend wasn’t autistic and our union greatly benefitted from our contrasting brains.

The truth is that in so many situations in my life, and many others, it’s about finding a balance and finding the right person for the job with tools crafted from melded, unified communities.

As we seamlessly segue into the political landscape, the autistic community is full of politics too and it can often be just as divisive as our own with Labour, Conservatives, Liberal Democrats etcetera.

There are high-profile autistic people in the media, whose names I am choosing not to mention at the risk of giving them more exposure for the messages they put forth and their backgrounds respectively and the fact I am doing that gives weight to the idea of politics within the autistic community.

Some people in our community have grown up thinking that they need to be fixed or associate with people that deem autism as needing to be ‘fixed’ and this narrative pervades autistic and neurotypical circles alike.

So as the trend of Autistic History Month reigns supreme in our consciousness, it’s important for us ALL to do the following:

See the past.

Read about the present.

Write the future.


November 2019 -  31 Days And Counting

Autistic History Month is soon to be over. Over in the minds of those that only cared for 31 days.

Over in the minds of politicians. Over in the minds of the general public.

But it's not over for me and my community.

 

How do we keep the messages of history informing our future? Children.

Children's minds are conduits to an unbiased, unrestrained glee that we get weened off when we're older in favour of 'growing up.'

You're only as young as you feel, so they say, and whilst we cannot be Benjamin Button, Disney have been releasing and will continue to release some very interesting material in relation to the autistic community. You guessed it, aimed at children.

Pablo is in series 2 after a very successful series 1 and is the first series on Disney to feature an autistic central character (likely debatable when you think about undiagnosed individuals but let's keep it simple) and I think that, on the whole, it's a triumph.

I don't actually watch TV (really) and am surviving just fine without it but when it comes to bringing children up in a world that has authentic autistic representation, it makes me elated to know that Pablo exists. Autistic children exist. Allies of the autistic community exist. Remember that.

From the straightforward to the subtle with Float on Disney's streaming platform.

It follows the story of a boy that literally floats…symbolising 'difference' and whilst it's not explicitly about someone autistic, it can easily be seen as being about us especially when the filmmaker has said in a making-of video that his son is on the spectrum. Woop woop!

I can see both sides of the argument with 'labelling' a child as 'different' or saying 'autistic' but the reason I get riled up when I hear this hesitance is that 'autistic' is not a dirty word. And what better way to embrace the autistic identity than by entering it into the young generations of untainted minds. A fresh start indeed.

By having more children speaking their truths and connecting with their autistic peers, it breeds the very environment I've mentioned in The Compassionate Classroom.

Media's portrayal of the autistic identity is crucial for this to happen and Disney are doing a good job in breaking down the stigmas and truly 'seeing' us.

 

Now, cynics would reserve full indulgence in what they are doing due to feelings of Disney hopping on a bandwagon of 'trendy' topics such as being autistic and perhaps merely making money for their new streaming platform but from reports I have read and shares from really amazing autistic organisations such as Autistic Inclusive Meets (AIM) in London, I am confident in Disney's ability to hear us. If not, there is now a precedent and I think that we as autistic people can feel empowered to be part of the narrative. In the 'Loop.' one could say.

And that leads me to Loop, due for release on 10th January 2020, it's about 'a non-verbal, autistic girl and a chatty boy [who] are partnered on a canoeing trip. To complete their journey across an urban lake, they must both learn how the other experiences the world' (Yahoo.com)

It's really difficult sometimes to see the bright side of things when so much tragedy is occurring, this month and every other, but I also need people and for myself to acknowledge those times when autistic people are not put on a pedestal of pity, used as inspiration porn or for anything else counterproductive, but put on equal footing with everyone else.

We are not textbooks, we are people (from my poem 'Nameless') and the array of content that is hitting and will continue to hit our screens and blast into the lives of children, with our technology only moving forward from here, is deeply pleasing.

I'll be in London for the Autistic Christmas Craft Fair with AIM on December 1 but there's more news coming soon on other things….

December 2019 - Deskilling With Love

Tis the season to be jolly (or grotty if you’re feeling ill) and the gift giving comes fast and furious for friends, families and loved ones all round.

But the best gift we can someone this year is love...or is it?

There is nothing wrong with showing people that you love them by buying or making something that matters to them, temporarily like chocolate, or more permanent like a special photo calendar, but the intangible effects of showing love can harm more than they can help.

 

Some people would call it ‘wrapping up in cotton wool.’ We do things to protect our children but sometimes we forget that those children become adults…in cotton wool.

Some would call what we need to administer ‘tough love’ and I’m not sure that’s how I would phrase it. We just need to be mindful of the lessons we teach to our young, the way we handle the cargo of communication that is carried forward.

Never is this truer when there are vulnerable individuals in our personal or professional lives.

It’s far too easy to judge mental capacity on our internal assumptions like whether someone can verbally talk to us and it’s all too easy to fall into a sense of ‘failure’ as a parent or blaming something or someone for when a child isn’t currently, or ever, able to communicate as we expect.

But it’s also this attitude that, if built up over years, can set dangerous precedents for limiting people’s opportunities to thrive, authentically, as their own person.

What we put on paper in terms of diagnoses (and far too often misdiagnoses) can add to this problem too.

For example, someone who hits a member of staff due to her routine being broken is then seen as exhibiting ‘challenging behaviour.’

But from that point onward, let’s say when that individual transitions to college, they are seen as being unable to be with peers.

The individual grows lonely and seeks out contact with staff or whomever they see as important in their lives but they can only do this through non-verbal communication.

They try grabbing, biting, touching and all of these methods of communication are seen as ‘challenging’ or ‘appropriate.’

 

The college staff members might have thought that they are keeping the individual away from others with their best interests at heart but this is far from the case.

Of course, I made that scenario up and there are many questions to ask if that was real (but situations like this DO happen) however this happens at home too.

Family members can believe that, because they see the individual every day, they are always doing what’s in their best interests (and this is not to discredit their value) but often family and loved ones can make decisions, based on what they think they know and not what the individual knows inside themselves when given a different environment, different approach or just space to be their true selves.

We can all deskill individuals with love.

What they might have been able to do or wanted to do in school wasn’t nurtured in college so the passion died and emotions poured out into what we see as ‘challenging.’

What we didn’t think they couldn’t do might just be a slight change away from making a world of difference.

Sometimes the best intentions get the worst results. That’s a really difficult truth to bear for a lot of people because people don’t like to be wrong but it is so crucial that we presume competence unless proven otherwise to ensure that the individuals in personal and professional lives don’t go astray from their true developmental pathways.

Are there times when we need to formalise with diagnoses a set of needs in order to get the right signposts for support? Absolutely.

But so often, taking a step back can mean great leaps forward in the journey.


December 2019 - The Fabulous 4

My birthday is 30th December so as a kid, Christmas used to mean more than it does now but I can hold onto the community components of the event and I have a beautiful example to share.

It happened early last week on my way to work.

I arrived at the bus shelter where Nikita, as I later learned, was waiting for the bus that hadn’t turned up for her.

On a severely rainy day, she was cold and likely fed up and perhaps appreciated a bit of light conversational company.

So we began chatting and before long we were joined by Phil. We chatted about our lives, music tastes and the differences between generations. Phil quickly became the social glue in the situation and the original duo of Nikita and I turned into a trio of travellers, still awaiting transport.

And then Alice showed up in our own rainy Winter Wonderland. The Fabulous 4.

Again, introductions were made and before long, the bus came.

Ellis, a wonderfully energized and determined young man and member of Autistic Led and thriving in his new job, stepped off and informed me of what he was thought was happening and that he had gone all along the back roads hence the bus passengers had taken so long.

I had a choice to make.

Nikita had decided to get a taxi to where she needed to be before the bus and Alice was arranging a lift.

So it was Phil and I that decided to take the journey and the initial community spirit of talking to strangers wasn’t lost on the way because a few kind South Holland citizens decided to chat to, and ultimately help, the driver in our collective disaster…or the potential of one.

The bus driver himself was calm and whoever he got his training from, as well as the bus company, should be proud of him.

Couldn’t have been an easy situation to have suddenly found yourself in, having to navigate the torrential rain and thin backroads as he did was commendable.

 

Long story cut short, I got where I needed to be and I am reminded of the caring nature and social willingness of some of our people in South Holland.

At a time when it might be argued that our nation is divided over so many various issues, I felt this was an important message to share and it was a fun ride!

Many thanks to The Fabulous 4.

 

December 2019 - The Ripple Effect

Someone close to me once said, knowing my tendency to procrastinate and lack executive functioning skills sometimes, that I wouldn’t complete a book. Not my poetry book (Movement: Performance Poetry Written Down) but a fictional story that I wanted to not only publish but make into a film.

To their surprise and delight, which I share because I consider myself quite self-aware, I have completed a novella.

So not quite a book but I have started and finished a plot, which excites me personally and creates a narrative led by an autistic identity that has historically been sorely missed but has grown tremendously since and will continue to grow in regards to the strength and solidarity of our presence.

 

The story involves an autistic man called Lucas and Janice who has dementia.

 

I would like to share in this column, the blurb for the film and the first part of the novelette.

Please let me know your thoughts via email or Facebook (link is at at the end of this column.)

*Janice Blurb

Irrespective of any differences it may have...

If we take it on as ours, we should love it all the same.

Lucas is a rebel against the norms.

He's adapted to his surroundings and made a life for himself.

He has a job, his own flat and yet he's not satisfied.

He is masking as a muted, safe version of himself most days and it's draining.

Janice's mind is not what it used to be but she's still searching for Greg, a mystery figure of her past.

In a bid to find his true self and shine a light on his old friend Janice's life, Lucas becomes Greg.

A journey of self-discovery reveals more than first expected.

10 years earlier: The Beginning

Dead

Approaching my end, I tread along the High Bridge overlooking the river and I am ready to jump.

My last few moments set in a loop reverberating around my tortured mind's echo chamber.

And yet I smile at the irony of the water's ripples that seem to symbolise the potential of a new beginning.

The past is in my hands but inside I am lifeless.

But it is too late for me.

I have found solace in solitude and it is time for me to go.

My sins command me to cleanse my soul.

Dying

My son is so challenging.

I love him but...is that always enough?

Can't you have tough love? Is he enough

Well, anyway, he knows what he's doing.

He is always having tantrums and his stress causes me stress.

Always up late, handing me notes like a child.

I'll talk to him like an adult when he decides to be one.

Trapped in his own world, he looks so sad and frustrated.

I wish I could put him out of his misery. Out of mine.

I wonder what type of future he will have.I mean, it is every parent's fear.

In a way, I wish I had someone to guide me because he is not telling me anything with those notes. I never know how he feels!

Honestly, sometimes I wonder if he feels anything.

Alive

My dad doesn't care for me. He wants me to conform.

I can't handle that pressure.

I struggle with speaking but that doesn't mean I am voiceless.

My notebook is my companion, my creativity and my communication in life but, like me, it is rejected in favour of 'typical' development.

I write him notes so he can read my thoughts but he doesn't see them and would rather I 'talk like someone my age should.'

But that doesn't always work with people like me, you see...

I'm autistic.

When I am so often overwhelmed by the confusion and chaos of this world, this world that is unsuitable for my needs and wants, I turn to my notebook.

I'm not locked in my own world but I want to be free from this one, that's for sure.

I can show you a horizon of communication, of deep and meaningful connection, but if only you would broaden your view to see it.

Engage and embrace me!

My needs and wants can somewhat vary depending on how the world is behaving but really we're all worthy of basic human rights and stuff, aren't we?

Still, I am punished for being who I am and not who you want me to be and I am writing this now to tell you that I am done with it all.

I cannot continue with these lies.

The lie that I am good enough to be your son. The lie that I am happy.

The lie I tell myself that you will one day read these notes.

Well you can finally get around to it now that I am leaving this place. I'll leave them out for you.

My voice was always here but...

Do you hear me now?

Revival

I found what was left of my son.

His body had pulsed with purpose.

He had left behind ink and paper and that should have been enough for me but I wanted more.

I wanted him to be...someone other than himself and I am so sorry about that now.

I feel like I killed my son.

So I took his glass bottle filled with his passion, his communication, to the High Bridge with me and I asked my son and myself for forgiveness.

I'm about to jump.

But before I do, you will know that I threw his messages, and mine, into the river in the hope that others can learn from the mistakes I made and learn from my autistic son.

My beautiful autistic son. You must do away with conformity.

Instead of forcing autistic people to take your journey....like I did...take a journey together.

I never found my son.

He left home two days ago.

His name is Jacob Parman, 18 years old.

If you are reading this, tell him that his father heard him...

 

*Read what is now called Ripples on Substack here: Callum Brazzo's Ripples Series (Substack) | Substack



An Autistic Christmas - Collaboration with Tierneys Gallery - See our Collaborators for the STORY and COVER IMAGE

 

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